The way a person sleeps says a lot about them. But what happens when you add a second person to the mattress ?
When we fall into deep sleep , our subconscious takes over. The way our body responds to our partner can inform us about our relationships. Whether you enjoy being entangled with your significant other or prefer to keep your personal space, your preferred sleeping position can help you gauge the state of your relationship beyond what's happening when you're conscious.
Here we present to you 15 couples sleeping positions and what they mean. We also surveyed over 1,000 people to find out the favorite positions of people who share a bed with their partner. Things are about to get personal.
1. The spoon
A classic position, spooning involves one partner adopting a protective, intimate position behind the other, while the other person presses their back or bottom against them. It is a skin-to-skin position that provides a lot of emotional and physical comfort. If you like this position, chances are you're in a brand new relationship or just can't get enough of each other.
The big spoon
In this position, you are the one who forms a protective embrace behind your partner. If you prefer to be the big spoon, you are probably a very generous partner and want to comfort your partner.
As a Little Spoon, you like to feel safe and protected by your partner. When it comes to your relationship, maybe you need a little more attention and care.
2. The chasing spoon
This is a variation of the spoon position. Instead of both being squeezed together in the center of the bed , both partners move to one side of the bed and their partner follows or "chases" them. The pursued partner usually prefers to sleep in a fetal or puck position, while the "pursuer" sleeps in a supine position.
This can mean two things. Either the hunted partner likes to play tough, or they withdraw and want more space from their "hunter." It can also be a sign that his needs are not being met. The “hunter” may also want more attention from their partner.
3. Loose Spoon
While partners in a new relationship tend to favor spooning, couples who have been dating for a long time often don't need the novelty of constant body-to-body contact. In the case of “loose spooning”, the two people adopt a more spaced position for better quality sleep . You've been together long enough to feel a lot of trust without needing reassurance through constant contact.
If you're the big spoon, this position basically means you can be counted on at all times, but you know that you and your little spoon like the extra comfort that comes with a little space for each other.
4. Back to back
People who fall asleep with contact along the spine demonstrate a balance between closeness and independence. If your butts are touching - also known as "the moon landing" - it means you both want to stay sexually connected while feeling comfortable in front of each other. If you prefer this position, chances are you will be very comfortable and relaxed with each other. You may have had a fight recently, but your willingness to touch each other means your relationship is still good.
5. Face to face
A slight variation from being completely intertwined, both partners are facing each other with their heads at the same level. They may also touch each other lightly, with their arms draped over each other. This intimate position indicates that both people are like-minded and that there is a good atmosphere in the relationship.
6. The cradle of the heart
In this gentle, nurturing position, one partner rests their head on the other's chest with their legs intertwined and pressed together. A couple who prefers this sleeping position has a high level of trust and teamwork between them. This position is a sign of protection and romanticism and is favored by many new couples or by those who have reconnected with their love life.
7. Head on each other's shoulder
Also known as the shingles position, this position allows both partners to sleep on their backs , with one resting their head on the other's shoulder. It demonstrates a high level of camaraderie, with one partner allowing the other to play the role of "protector" and look after him. This position indicates understanding and trust in the relationship.
8. Leg hug
If a person has a leg or feet touching their partner, it may mean that person is craving a sexual or emotional connection. A pair of entangled legs shows that your lives are connected and that you exist as a unit.
Being completely intertwined with your lover is an incredibly close and romantic position. This position is popular among new couples and can sometimes be a transitional position before or after a couple's intimacy.
If you and your partner have just started dating, this position is a sign of young love between the two of you. Some couples maintain this position throughout their relationship, but it can mean that these two people are dependent on each other.
In this position, both partners are initially entangled in each other before unraveling into a more comfortable sleeping position after a few minutes. It allows the couple to benefit from the best of both worlds and shows a balance between the intimacy and independence of both individuals.
11. Both on their stomachs
A couple who sleeps on their stomachs can experience anxiety and fear in their relationship. If the two aren't touching at all, it could be a sign of anxiety or a lack of sexual confidence. If you and your partner fall asleep in this position, it may be time for the two of you to discuss your relationship.
12. The Space Pig
In this position, one partner plays the role of the "starfish", that is, he stretches out and takes up the majority of the mattress space, while his partner plays a secondary role. If the starfish partner begins to push away their partner, this indicates that they are being selfish in the relationship.
Additionally, if one partner takes up space and positions themselves higher than the other, they tend to view themselves as more dominant and self-confident. It may be good for the couple to have a frank conversation about the power dynamics in their relationship.
13. No contact, back to back
Not touching isn't a bad thing — in fact, a couple's willingness to sleep separately is a sign of strong independence.
Couples who sleep back to back without touching are generally both connected and independent. Also known as " liberty lovers ", this sleeping position demonstrates a high level of security. On the other hand, if you sleep on your own side, this may indicate that you want to be more separated. This may also be a sign that you should upgrade to a larger mattress .
14. No contact, side to side
If you face each other in your sleep without touching, it may mean that you need something more in your relationship. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, as you can take positive steps to bridge the gap.
15. Pet Barrier
Sharing your bed with your dog or cat is more and more common these days. For some couples, placing a pet between them can be a way to have a little more space at night and strengthen the strong bond between you and your pet. However, it can also mean that you are avoiding something in your relationship. Maybe you should consider talking to your partner about it or buying a separate bed for your dog.
Survey Results on How Couples Prefer to Sleep
Now that we've covered the different variations of couples sleeping positions , which one do most couples prefer? To find out, we conducted a Google survey of 1,000 couples on how they prefer to sleep with their significant other.
According to our survey, 46% of couples prefer to sleep without touching each other . This suggests that many couples feel comfortable in their relationship or that they prioritize comfort and sleep quality over touch. “No contact is favored almost equally by men and women, but less by young couples aged 18 to 24 than by other age groups.
Spooning is the second favorite sleeping position for couples . If the spooning dynamic between couples reflects usual conventions, 30% of women prefer to be the "big spoon" and 24% of men prefer to be the "little spoon."
Couples who sleep back to back make up the second largest group in our survey. This position is favored by older couples - those over 25 are at least twice as likely to sleep back to back as those under 25. Finally, when it comes to intertwined sleeping, we found that men were 13% more likely than women to prefer this position.
Since body language is often influenced by the subconscious, a couple's sleeping position can be a reflection of their conscious selves. However, the way you and your partner sleep certainly isn't going to make or break your relationship. Instead, this guide should help you communicate your sleep preferences to your partner.
If you and your partner are looking for the most comfortable sleep , a queen mattress might just be the ideal mattress for couples. For those who want more space to add more love, a king mattress is ideal for sleeping with a child or pet.
The statistics on couples' preferred sleeping positions come from a survey by Google Surveys. The sample consisted of 1,000 Americans and was conducted during the month of May 2019. Post-stratification weighting was used to obtain a representative sample of the population.